shared with DBE Wilson by Anon
Images are of professional models, not real BDSM participants.
The inner space of a sub is different than that of a dom, but they both are transformative.
Even vanilla sex practiced properly, can transform one’s state of consciousness, transporting a person in an altered state, where the focus on your partner in virtually total, and nothing else in the world can get your attention.
Trans-formative BDSM for the sub is bringing a sub into a complete internal awareness while experiencing intensely both the threat of pain (a tease) and the actuality of it. My experience as a sub led me to realms never traveled before, letting go of control, not only of my body but of my mind and spirit.
In the midst of serious physical agony, this release of control leads to a great tranquility and an experience of pain itself as a release from the real world into a magical kingdom. Submission to a Dom is itself transformative, but when combined with extremes of sadism and confinement, led me to a new appreciation of my life as a whole.
As what my Mistress called a “pain slut” I actively encouraged her to inflict greater and greater degrees of pain, including bondage, flogging, humiliation, needle play, breath limits, biting and cock torture. I don’t think she ever reached a point where I wanted to use the safe word or gesture as a response to the application of pain to my body. The harder she beat me, the more severe the visible bruising, the more the agony drove me inside my mind, the more I demanded from her.
I suppose there was one time when I used the safe word to end a submissive experience, but it wasn’t from the pain or the threat of pain, but from a fear of public exposure.
Eventually, the relationship ended, but I’ve ever since longed for what she gave me in the way of freedom and transformation. Because she was willing to put her entire self into taking me close to my limits, she was extraordinary and I’ve never met her match in my many years since.
She has been my inspiration as a Master since I transitioned from sub to Dom. As a Dom I’m totally focused on my submissive, both on her journey into submission, bondage or masochistic pain, but also her complete safety so that she is free to let go of internal restraint, and travel to that distant country of altered consciousness.